<jonathan> HAVE RESOLVED TO BE THE BAD GUY
just got off lunch with my mom. Again finding out about the whole family, because I never have time to sit down and talk to them. First meal I had with my mum this whole week. She again talked about my grandma. My lone surviving grandparent is not doing well. She's in alot of pain at the moment because of the cancer in her leg bones, and she has made up her mind to drop morphine and stick to something else.
If she goes, this will be a sad day for me, this is the grandma I love the most.At least she has a relationship going with God.
Again about the whole grace and truth thing, how do you cope?
Should I have to sit aside and watch my friends or ppl I worry about slowly slip back into a lifestyle or relationship that truly does hurt God and distract us from Him? Or should I be 'impolite' and invade their 'boundaries' and speak the truth, hoping that they'll listen?Remember the truth is frequently ugly. To shelter them and coddle them or to tell them the truth hoping that they'll wake up? I am sick of the 'I need my time off' sort of thinking, 'I just want to chill out', 'I want to take a break'...
HOW DO YOU 'TAKE A BREAK' FROM GOD??
HE NEVER 'TAKES A BREAK' FROM YOU!?!?!?!?!
We go on hiatus from this kind of relationship, and doing God things, letting them give way to 'our' things which we think we deserve(another justification), and truly basically tell God to buck out of our lives. Then we all turn around when something bad happens and say "God, where were You? Where were You when I needed You around?"
I AM SO SICK OF HEARING THAT AND WATCHING PPL ROT!!!!
</jonathan> <!--8:52 PM-->
The funniest thing happened tonite, totally made my day. It's a joke that only guitar players may be able to understand, but I'll try...it's totally true and not a joke, just that we cracked up!
X was siting on the bus with me tonite. Also a bunch of others, and after the SE meeting, we went off to chill for a little while. All of us were carrying our guitars, all wierd and wonderful in nature, some you don't see often.
X was discussing guitar measurements with Y, and then X asked all of us if any of us had a ruler. None of us are boyscouts in that way, so naturally all said 'no'. X looked a little disappointed and stared at Y and his guitar in it's case. He then earnestly remarked, " I just wanted to measure the length of his nut."
it took a split second before it sank in to him, what he had just said and by then, for those of us who got it in an instant, we were roaring at the back of the bus, tears streaming down our cheeks.
It made my night, lah!
food for thought;
Karl Marx said(or indicated) that religion was the drug of the masses, indicating a form of untruth and distraction from the reality of the world.
I think that now, the self has become the distraction, and that God is the reality, but we choose to deny His existence, for fear of having to give up doing what is wrong and enjoyable. The world distracts us from the CREATOR of reality.
had a long day. nites.
</jonathan> <!--9:11 AM-->
<jonathan> I am so slack with this, maybe nebause I hardly ever got time now.
Recording left-right-centre and school to boot. So much I plan to do! ARRGGHHH! How to finish?
was confronted today with the topic of distraction. Not so much for myself, although QT could always use polishing.
why is it that we allow ourselves to be distracted with the mundane, the useless and the needless?
why do we rush into things the second they become desirable in the least? Why do we hide feelings of guilt behind reason? For eg, why do we always 'rationalize' what we choose to do, or re-write in our hearts, our core beliefs in order to accomodate ourselves and selfishness?
Have realised that the majority of the time, if we rationalize, it means we are possibly already convicted by the truth and then guilt is already yelling at us like a discman on loud volume, audible to ourselves, ans slightly audible to those around us. Then we start to say "It's for a good reason."
If it takes effort to find and number the good reasons for doing something, then we're kidding ourselves.
Justification can be a sign of covering guilt.
enough of that. I am saddened enough already. so many people around me justifying themselves and avoiding the issue.
If I ask you a question, or you come to me with a topic, please follow-through all the way.
If you say "you're invading my space," am I therefore hitting a sore topic? Are you feeling guilty? Are we making something to be nobler than it is?
I pose you a riddle; how do you be truthful, and avoid personally uncomfortable topics at the same time?
Grace or 'politeness' VS the truth? where do you put your money on?
</jonathan> <!--5:19 AM-->
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